Dress pressure! It was a little hard for me to choose what to talk about first when starting this blog, but growing up in a family business in the industry of special occasion dresses, the topic became obvious…Family and friends that want you to pick that dress that you kinda-sorta-don’t-really—like.
A little on the family business:
My mother is a retired seamstress and dressmaker for more than 40 years, and she had dealt with hundreds of clients who looked for dresses for baptisms, communions, quinceañeras, and of course weddings. I grew up in the middle of it all! Although my mother made and designed her own dresses, she would have many clients come in with their own designs and tear sheets to chop up and compile into one mega dress. She always enjoyed these clients because even though they wanted a little bit of everything, it was still their decision of what they wanted for their special event.
The dress pressure that I’m referring to is from the mother, the sisters, the best friends, and even dad, and what THEY think your dress should look like for your special day. It can be a very difficult and very tricky (at times) of a situation. As a bride, we understand that you don’t want to disappoint your family because as much as this is a day about you and the love of your life, you want to make sure that in the midst of the chaotic planning, that you are still listening to their suggestions and in no way want to seem disrespectful. Granted, this is the one time where you as the bride should put your foot down when the suggestions and comments begin to get a little out of hand, and beyond YOUR likes for a dress. I can’t count the times where I have seen many soon-to-be brides, quinceañera’s, and even girls ready to receive communion, become so frustrated and cry because no one is listening to what she wants and is going to wear for HER special event.
So, before anyone reaches that frustrating moment, let’s rewind and observe the DO’s and DON’Ts when it comes to choosing the dress for your special day. Let’s be sure to NOT fall into the pressure of finding the dress RIGHT NOW.
DO’s: When dress shopping, take only those that you trust to help select a dress. People who will listen to what you want and like.
DON’Ts: The more people you take, the more opinions you’ll get. I’ve seen these situations start off great, and then quickly turn into a bit of a competition of whose dress selection the bride likes best. Take 3-4 people, MAX.
DO’s: Be mindful of the location and weather of your wedding. You’re wearing the dress for an entire day, you definitely WANT to be comfortable.
DON’Ts: Do not ignore your budget. Everyday we encounter an item or two that we really love at the store, but the price tag is a wee-bit much. Don’t shop out of your comfort zone because you don’t want to fall in love with a dress that can never be.
DO’s: When trying on dresses, bring the appropriate undergarments. Not just a simple bra and some undies, but the actual undergarments that you plan on wearing on the day of. If you plan on wearing shapewear on the day of, definitely wear it–especially for fittings and alterations! Don’t forget your shoes!
DON’Ts: Do not ignore suggestions from the seamstress. The seamstress has worked on hundreds and hundreds and thousands of dresses, so her advice should be sought out. A common request from brides is to make the dress longer to where the front is dragging on the floor. The idea looks beautiful while standing in front of a mirror and not moving, but no matter how light your dress may be, it will sag and begin to settle throughout the day, which will become even longer than it once looked. Remember, you want to dance, not mop the floor.
DO’s: Take your time 🙂
DON’Ts: Do not settle on a dress if you’re not feeling it. It’s okay to leave and come back for a second, third, or however many rounds you need. Unless you’re absolutely positive that you found the one, don’t ever settle for any dress.
Hope this all helps!
Have an amazing day and remember to breathe.
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